Silver Screen Week
I'm on a break right now, but sob, sob - there's but a week left. So much chilling to do, such little time. Alas, onward. I watched a few movies during the break, and tried to post my comments on them, but this FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT BLOGGER.COM BULLSHIT LOST MY WORK! Fuck thats frustrating! Yes, onward.
The Da Vinci Code: I had huge expectations for this movie. Tom Hanks, a brilliant actor if there ever was one, a conspiracy plot, foreign locales and hidden meanings. Wicked. Yeah ... umm, no. The movie failed to please on a number of counts, but what pissed me off the most was that in the promos, they have that Magneto-playing guy saying something about this being the greatest coverup of all time and some junk. So I thought that there would be some huge revelation, that would come at great expenses and be bold. Nope, not really. Just the Magneto-playing guy saying the same line he said in the promo. That's it. And the fact that the holy grail was so underwhelming as to be simply a PERSON was just ghetto. She didn't even have any special powers or anything! The painting that is used as the poster for the movie - the Mona Lisa is not even a part of the movie, basically. And one more rant - near the end, when they're in Magneto's plane landing in England, the police are following the plane to the hangar after it lands. When the police arrive at the hangar, they find only Magneto in the plane and he drives off in his car, with Tom Hanks and the French chick hiding in the back. The director then thinks that the audience can understand obscure references and has posed analyses on Da Vinci's work (because they talk about it matter-of-factly), but this same viewer is incapable of deducing that Tom Hanks and the chick got out early and snuck into the car, so he does this recap type of video sequence. That's almost insulting. Overall the movie was underwhelming as a result of my expectations, and just about OK from an unbiased point of view.
X-Men 3: They had this old-school sign outside of the theater that said X-Man 3. Jokes. This movie wasn't bad. It seemed like a continuation of the other two, which you can see as bad or good. That pretty much sums up the movie then, if you liked the first two, you'd like this one too. I gotta say that whatever CG made Magneto and Xavier look younger is cool! Imagine the possibities: Connery as Bond again, David Hasselhoff as Michael Knight again. Aside from the CG though, Captain Jean-Luc Picard barely ages though, wouldn't you agree?
Over The Hedge: Not a bad movie. I went in with no expectations, and came out pleasantly surprised. It seems like they really try to push moral-based stories for animated movies. Why doesn't anyone try something a little more risque, more adult? Its a bigger, richer audience ya know! Those artistic idiots know jack about business. Anyways, the movie - had really nice lighting effects. Certain things were funny too - like their point of view on humans. Not bad.
Cars: Generally, animated movies are for kids and this is no exception. The plot is as thick as Niles - another movie about eschewing the good life and getting back to wholesome hick life. The animation though was fucking wicked. At times, it almost looked like claymation (but really smooth), which is cool. This was an OK movie.
The Omen: I guess this a remake, because I haven't seen the original. They say it is. Whatever. Julia Stiles is too young for her role. Her husband, the main character is DEAD. He is completely devoid of emotion and expression! He really sucked a lot. When you remake a movie, you wanna recreate the essence of it for a whole new generation. It seems to me that most of the shots were an exact copy of the original (because they don't appear modern, and the flow and screenplay is really different from the mainstream). It didn't work that well if you ask me. A couple of shots were downright cheezy - like when the main character sees his photographer friend die, he has a cheesed-out look of horror and the camera shakes violently for some reason. That so doesn't cut it in 2006. The movie itself wasn't that bad, but it didn't scare me either. It didn't effectively build the suspense and terror of the coming of the antichrist, either. I just found out that the movie had the biggest Tuesday opening of all time, bigger even than a Lord of the Rings movie. That's something, for sure, but the movie was just a bit better than OK.
The Da Vinci Code: I had huge expectations for this movie. Tom Hanks, a brilliant actor if there ever was one, a conspiracy plot, foreign locales and hidden meanings. Wicked. Yeah ... umm, no. The movie failed to please on a number of counts, but what pissed me off the most was that in the promos, they have that Magneto-playing guy saying something about this being the greatest coverup of all time and some junk. So I thought that there would be some huge revelation, that would come at great expenses and be bold. Nope, not really. Just the Magneto-playing guy saying the same line he said in the promo. That's it. And the fact that the holy grail was so underwhelming as to be simply a PERSON was just ghetto. She didn't even have any special powers or anything! The painting that is used as the poster for the movie - the Mona Lisa is not even a part of the movie, basically. And one more rant - near the end, when they're in Magneto's plane landing in England, the police are following the plane to the hangar after it lands. When the police arrive at the hangar, they find only Magneto in the plane and he drives off in his car, with Tom Hanks and the French chick hiding in the back. The director then thinks that the audience can understand obscure references and has posed analyses on Da Vinci's work (because they talk about it matter-of-factly), but this same viewer is incapable of deducing that Tom Hanks and the chick got out early and snuck into the car, so he does this recap type of video sequence. That's almost insulting. Overall the movie was underwhelming as a result of my expectations, and just about OK from an unbiased point of view.
X-Men 3: They had this old-school sign outside of the theater that said X-Man 3. Jokes. This movie wasn't bad. It seemed like a continuation of the other two, which you can see as bad or good. That pretty much sums up the movie then, if you liked the first two, you'd like this one too. I gotta say that whatever CG made Magneto and Xavier look younger is cool! Imagine the possibities: Connery as Bond again, David Hasselhoff as Michael Knight again. Aside from the CG though, Captain Jean-Luc Picard barely ages though, wouldn't you agree?
Over The Hedge: Not a bad movie. I went in with no expectations, and came out pleasantly surprised. It seems like they really try to push moral-based stories for animated movies. Why doesn't anyone try something a little more risque, more adult? Its a bigger, richer audience ya know! Those artistic idiots know jack about business. Anyways, the movie - had really nice lighting effects. Certain things were funny too - like their point of view on humans. Not bad.
Cars: Generally, animated movies are for kids and this is no exception. The plot is as thick as Niles - another movie about eschewing the good life and getting back to wholesome hick life. The animation though was fucking wicked. At times, it almost looked like claymation (but really smooth), which is cool. This was an OK movie.
The Omen: I guess this a remake, because I haven't seen the original. They say it is. Whatever. Julia Stiles is too young for her role. Her husband, the main character is DEAD. He is completely devoid of emotion and expression! He really sucked a lot. When you remake a movie, you wanna recreate the essence of it for a whole new generation. It seems to me that most of the shots were an exact copy of the original (because they don't appear modern, and the flow and screenplay is really different from the mainstream). It didn't work that well if you ask me. A couple of shots were downright cheezy - like when the main character sees his photographer friend die, he has a cheesed-out look of horror and the camera shakes violently for some reason. That so doesn't cut it in 2006. The movie itself wasn't that bad, but it didn't scare me either. It didn't effectively build the suspense and terror of the coming of the antichrist, either. I just found out that the movie had the biggest Tuesday opening of all time, bigger even than a Lord of the Rings movie. That's something, for sure, but the movie was just a bit better than OK.
posted by Loy at 4:05 p.m.
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